


this is the road to ruin

by jacksonwhipitmore



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Accidental Voyeurism, Blow Jobs, Exhibitionism, Face-Sitting, Implied Intercrural Sex, M/M, Oral Sex, Pegging (referenced), Thinly Veiled & Badly Written Plot, Truth or Dare
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-03-31
Packaged: 2018-05-28 22:25:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6348025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jacksonwhipitmore/pseuds/jacksonwhipitmore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fives times Ray enjoyed the show + the time he was the show.</p>
            </blockquote>





	this is the road to ruin

**Author's Note:**

  * For [crownedcarl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/crownedcarl/gifts).



> title from fall out boy's "alone together."
> 
> cold atom has completely taken over my life. luca is not helping, just encouraging. so this is for him. also because he beta'd the hell out of this and i'm forever indebted tbh.
> 
> i tried to keep them as in-character as i could but lmao i'm awful at it.

**1.**

The first time is, of course, in Russia during the winter of 1986. He’s lurking in the shadows, staying close to the trees, and watching as Snart metaphorically flirts the pants off Valentina. Ray doesn’t know why he’s so surprised that she finds Snart charming. He has that bad-boy vibe, with the slow drawl that people always flock to. Never mind the fact that he’s actually a criminal. (He supposes Vostok would just scoff at his criminal record, anyhow. Russians do it better.)

He can’t really hear what they’re saying and he finds himself wishing he could. To keep his teammate safe, of course. But it appears that Snart disabled his comm, because all he can make out is the _sound_ of their voices over the cold wind, but none of the actual words.

Ray huffs and crosses his arms, shoving his hands under his armpits in an attempt to warm them back up. Rip is muttering about ‘bloody 21st century fools who don’t listen to their captain’ in his ear and Ray is actually tempted to turn his own communications device off to get some peace of mind.

Snart and Valentina finally come to a stop. They’re too far away for Ray to be of any help if Snart should need it, so he quickly jogs to stand behind the statue a few feet away from the pair. Valentina moves in front of Snart with a soft, inviting smile, and Ray can finally hear well enough to know she’s asking him up to her place. He lets out a sigh of a relief when she starts to hand him his coat back, sliding it down her arms like she’s trying to get him to change his mind. She probably is.

Ray probably would have, if he were in Snart’s shoes.

But she leans in to kiss Snart and Ray turns away, stomach churning at the sight. The fact that the metal should be cold against his back but isn’t serves as an unpleasant reminder that pretty much everything on his body is frozen. He chances a peek around the statue to catch the end of their kiss, watches as she sashays away. Ray doesn’t move, in case she decides to turn around.

“You enjoy the show, _Raymond_?” Snart calls back to him after a minute or two has passed in silence between them.

Ray huffs and shuffles forward, “I think I’ve got some frostbite in some not-so-fun places from waiting out here. Did she tell you what kind of weapon Savage is planning?”

“It didn’t come up,” he shrugs. “Such a romantic evening, I didn’t want to spoil the _mood._ ”

Ray’s jaw drops open slightly. A violent shiver travels through his body and he wishes, not for the first time this night, that Gideon had given him his own wool coat. “So, other than a steamy goodnight kiss -- and a possible case of hypothermia -- we’ve got nothing.”

The other man smirks at him and takes a step closer. Ray doesn’t try to lean into the heat radiating from him, he _doesn’t_.

“I wouldn’t say that,” Snart says. He pulls a keycard out of his pocket, waving it in front of Ray’s face. “I swiped Valentina’s security badge for a place called Luskavic Labs.”

He shoves the card against Ray’s chest and waits until Ray brings his fingers up to grasp it before removing his hand. The spot stays warm for several more seconds.

“Whatever weapon she’s building for Savage, we’ll find it there,” he says as he starts walking in the direction they came from. Ray looks down at the badge, raising a definitely-not-impressed eyebrow.

“I guess I should just be happy that you didn’t swipe her wallet.” He goes to follow Snart, but stops short when the thief turns around. He brandishes a red wallet proudly. Ray heaves a sigh.

\--

**2.**

Ray thinks that, maybe, they should stop letting Leonard Snart come along on missions that could mean contact with the opposite sex. It was supposed to be a simple “get in, grab the file, get out” job. _Supposed_ being the operative word. Sara is in the middle of acquiring the file. Snart is flirting with the host’s wife.

Even Kendra, who Ray is playing arm candy to, looks like she’s about to throttle him.

“Maybe someone should go over and accidentally spill their drink on him,” Ray suggests. Kendra hums in agreement.

“Spill their drink on who?” Sara whispers over their communications line. 

“Snart,” Kendra and Ray reply at the same time. The man in question looks over at them, his flirtatious smile still painted on. Ray may or may not have the urge to stick his tongue out at him. He fights it.

“Deal with it later,” Sara’s voice crackles. A group of people pass by the pair, giving them odd looks. Ray flashes them what he hopes is a friendly, not-suspicious smile. “We have a problem; the file isn’t in his office.”

Kendra looks back to get Snart’s attention, but groans. “We have two problems, actually. Snart is gone.”

“You go help Sara, I’ll find him,” Ray tells her. Kendra squeezes his arm gently before leaving him to catch up with Sara. It’s only been a week since the Gulag and she worries about him. It’s nice to have someone do that again.

He finds Snart in a bedroom upstairs in a uniquely compromising position - Ray finds him on his knees with his head between a very married woman's legs. Her long dress is actually _covering_ his head, but it doesn’t exactly take a genius (which Ray is) to figure out what’s happening. Her own head is thrown back, so neither of them notice Ray enter.

The sounds the two are making are affecting him in a way he’s not proud of. He keeps telling himself that it’s not really his fault, but he still feels a flush of shame at the way his pants are more uncomfortable now than they were five minutes ago.

He clears his throat.

The woman’s – Ray tries to remember her name, but all he can recall from the debriefing is that she’s a newscaster – reaction is instant. She pushes herself away from Snart, scooting up the bed and making sure she's properly covered up. Snart, however, takes his time. He fixes his suit while still kneeling, clearing his own throat quietly.

“Did you _need_ something?” the woman snarls.

Ray’s mouth is suddenly very, very dry as he watches Snart wipe at his mouth with a thumb.

\--

**3.**

It's pretty rare for Ray to stay behind on the Waverider. He can usually at least shrink down and hide out in someone's pocket until he's needed. The only reason he’s forced to stay behind this time around is because the A.T.O.M suit got damaged on the last run.

To be fair, Mick also had to stay behind, but that’s more because he tried to burn Buckingham Palace down than because his gun was taken apart by a very angry Rip. He’s been grounded for the last couple outings.

Ray keeps an earpiece in to listen to the team, just in case. It's half concern, half him needing background noise to work. Mick’s crashing around in the kitchen, but it’s not enough.

He’s not paying attention to anything they’re saying, though. Sometimes they’ll ask him to look something up if Gideon somehow missed a piece of information earlier, but for the most part he’s focused on tinkering with his suit and they leave him alone in favor of completing whatever task it is they set off to do.

It happens about five seconds before Ray is about to reassemble a very important piece of his suit. It’s the piece that actually activates the shrinking system and it should be the only thing he’s concentrating on, but then he hears it. There had been quiet smacking sounds and labored panting the past few minutes, but Ray had been too engrossed in what he was doing to pay any mind to it, not to mention the sound of everyone else talking (more like arguing) drowned it out a little. Now that Ray is really paying attention, though, it clicks on what that sound was. And the thing that pulled him out of his work trance? A slow, deep drawl, “It seems you have some _personal_ business you need taken care of. You sure you can’t sneak off for a few minutes?”

“I believe I should have stayed on the Waverider with Mr. Palmer,” Stein says forlornly.

“ _Doctor_ Palmer,” Ray says automatically, at the same time Jax mutters an agreement of, “No kidding.”

“Ray, you might want to turn your earpiece off,” Kendra says. “You’re lucky enough to have that option.” She sounds so uncomfortable that Ray smiles.

The thing is, he was _about_ to turn his piece off. He had no reason to keep it online anymore. A few more tweaks here and there on his suit and he’d be finished. But Snart starts _talking_ again.

“Pull your pants down,” he says. Ray is honestly surprised. That’s probably why he’s not turned off the comms unit, because Snart usually does that for the team. Any time he’s getting, shall we say, involved with someone, he’ll shut his line down and do it in private. 

(He and Sara both are pretty bad about flirting with people while on missions, but it never compromises the job itself so Rip never says anything. He does throw them a few exasperated looks sometimes, though.)

Snart moans and Ray’s lungs stop working. “I absolutely hate that I won’t be able to take my time with you. You don’t want get into _trouble_ , though, do you?”

He almost sounds sincere.

The rest of the team is still talking about their task (they’d located a weapon Kendra could use to kill Savage; Ray is assuming that’s what the person Snart is distracting was guarding), but Ray is listening so intently to what Snart was doing that they might as well have been miles away.

“You’re going to do exactly as I say, aren’t you?”

Ray wonders what the mystery woman looks like. Snart’s type seems to be brown hair with matching eyes, but it’s not like the guard was handpicked for him. He goes with that, though; pictures long legs being revealed by muted colors of a generic guard uniform, dark eyes looking up at Leonard and waiting for her next instructions.

“Lick your palm,” his teammate says softly. Ray’s fingers twitch against his knee. “Now take us both in your hand. _Slowly._ We don’t want this to end so soon, do we?”

The room suddenly feels too hot as Ray realizes that the guard isn’t a woman. Snart has never made a move to seduce anyone who _wasn’t_ of the fairer sex, so Ray just (unfairly, guiltily) assumed he was straight.

He listens as Snart gives orders, telling the man to reach behind and open himself up. Enter another finger. Pump them for a little bit, _yeah, there you go._ Crook your fingers _just like this. Perfect._

“Fuck. Turn around. Put your hands against the wall and spread your legs a little.”

Ray is breathing a little too hard, his pants a little too tight. He notices that the other members of their team are awfully quiet and he isn’t sure if they’re as affected as he is or if it’s just awkward silence. Maybe they’ve turned their communication pieces off.

“I bet you would look so _good_ riding me, wouldn’t you?” Leonard asks. His own voice is a little strained. Ray drops the wrench he’s been gripping for the past five minutes.

There’s a noise that sounds suspiciously like Leonard is spitting and then a mutter of, “Close your legs a little – yeah, just like that.”

“Kendra has the weapon, we’re almost ready to leave,” Rip interrupts. “We just need a few more minutes.”

There’s a bunch of rustling and panting, but Ray’s not sure which comm link it’s coming from. The deep moan, though, he knows. They all know. Does Snart have even an ounce of shame?

“Ray, you there still?” Jax asks. He chokes out an affirmative. “Could you have Gideon let us in? Me and Grey are on our way.”

“Yeah, I’m coming,” Ray says. He clears his throat because his voice sounds hoarse and heads off to let them in. A loud moan rips through the transmission and Ray decides to leave his earpiece behind.

When the rest of team returns to the ship, they’re all avoiding eye contact with each other. Except for Snart, who looks smug, and Sara, who is grinning from ear to ear. 

\--

**4.**

After a certain amount of times, Ray has to wonder if Snart is doing it to him on purpose. If maybe Snart realized somewhere between Russia and now that Ray has developed feelings towards him and is making him suffer for his own sick amusement.

He didn’t mean for it to happen. Of all the people on this ship, Leonard Snart was the last person he expected to be hung up on. It’s just that Ray is finding out that after you see someone performing oral sex, hear them moan in your ear, and see how they kiss, it’s really difficult to get that person out of your head.

Sara Lance has possibly picked up on his feelings, too, he thinks. The fact that she’s currently forcing Ray, Leonard, Kendra, and Jax to play _truth or dare_ like they’re in junior high and not a save-the-world mission is his only real hint. At least they get to have alcohol, unlike the last time Ray played this.

(She tried to get Mick to play, but he just grunted at her. He is sitting in the corner cleaning his gun, though, so she probably counts it as a win.)

They’ve been playing for a few minutes now. They’ve all learned that Jax isn’t a virgin, Kendra’s had sex pretty much _everywhere_ , including the White House. Leonard has thought about Barry Allen while masturbating. Sara is a really good kisser (Ray finds this out when he chooses ‘dare’ for the first time). 

Jax is currently wearing Kendra’s bra, the most recent dare from a fairly drunk Mick. He stopped cleaning his gun about three rounds ago and is currently laid back in seat, interrupting with dares of his own every other turn. Still, he maintains that he’s not playing.

“Jesus, I need more vodka,” Kendra announces. She’s met with enthusiastic agreement and is gone maybe seven minutes. Leonard has dared Sara to a small strip tease in that time. (He told her she only had to take one article of clothing off and she chose her shirt. Ray would have chosen a sock.) Kendra places the bottle on the table and sighs, “I don’t even want to know.”

“Okay, Ray. Your turn,” Sara grins, “Truth or dare?”

“Truth. Definitely truth,” he answers immediately. He grabs the bottle and takes a deep drink.

“The last time you had kinky sex – where did you have it?” 

Ray furrows his eyebrows, trying to remember. He’s sad to admit that it’s been a long time since he’s had even _vanilla_ sex. Being legally dead and trapped in a tiny box kind of put a damper on that part of his life. “My loft in Star City had this wall of windows – kind of like Oliver’s. Right up against them. There’s an apartment building across the street and there’s definitely a chance an old lady saw us.”

“That’s not that kinky,” Mick accuses him.

“We don’t need commentary from the peanut gallery,” Ray says. He tries to not let it come out at as a squeak, but he’s fairly sure he failed. Mick does that growly-grunt thing he does in Ray’s direction.

“No, he’s right,” Kendra says. Traitor. “That wasn’t really all that kinky. A little adventurous, sure, but kinky?” She shrugs at him.

“Oh my _God_ , okay. The kinky part of that is that I wasn’t doing the, you know.”

“Fucking?” Sara supplies helpfully.

“Yeah. Felicity, she… It had been awhile and I really wanted to be… And she offered to…” He coughs, hating that he can’t seem to finish a sentence. He finds himself suddenly wishing people could die from embarrassment.

He’s met with a chorus of _ooo_ ’s from Sara and Kendra. Jax looks a little confused. Ray is refusing to meet Mick and Leonard’s eyes so he’s not really sure what their reactions are.

“Snart, truth or dare?” Kendra asks, saving Ray from further awkward silence. Leonard takes a quick shot and slams his glass on the table, upside down. Because he’s a damn drama queen.

“ _Dare_.”

“Kiss someone. Your choice,” Sara intervenes. Kendra looks kind of offended, like maybe she’d had a better one up her sleeve. Leonard smirks, glancing around to look over everyone at the table. Mick’s eyes peek open.

Ray might be holding his breath. He was sitting next to him, Jax on the other side of the thief. They would be the easy targets and considering Jax is only twenty to Snart’s thirty-eight, Ray finds himself hoping.

(He’s also angry with himself for hoping. He should not be crushing on Captain Cold.)

Honestly, he shouldn’t be so surprised when Snart stands slightly to lean over and kiss Sara. His only consolation is that she seems just as shocked, if a little mad. Still, her hand comes up to cup his cheek and her eyes close. She pushes herself up off her chair a little to respond properly.

Ray looks away. He doesn’t flinch at the wet sound their mouths make when they part, but it’s a close thing.

\--

**5.**

They’re on what Jax is calling “shore leave.” Aka, Rip is officially out of ideas on how to find Savage and he wanted them all off of the Waverider before they (Ray and Stein, mainly) completely dismantled his ship. They touch down in New York on New Year’s Eve, 1998. 

They find a dive bar on the edge of Brooklyn, one Stein had been to in his youth and remembered the food had been decent. Sara is dancing to a Destiny’s Child song with Jax and Kendra on the dance floor, the girls nearly falling over with laughter when Jax shows off his breakdance skills. Mick, Stein, and Leonard are sitting in a corner booth, nursing drinks while Mick and Stein argue over something. Snart is looking around the room, locking eyes with Ray every once in awhile.

Ray has been struggling with his feelings for Leonard for nearly two months now. Usually, he isn’t shy about going after whatever he wants. When he met Anna, it took all of thirty minutes for him to ask her out. Even Felicity, _before_ he realized he wanted to be with her romantically, he bought an entire company because he wanted the very best to work for him. The only reason he was conflicted after he realized he liked her as more than a friend was because Anna’s death was still fresh in his mind. 

What he’s getting at is this: Ray Palmer used to have confidence spilling out of his ears. But somewhere between losing Felicity to Oliver (‘ _can you lose someone you never truly had?_ ’, he constantly asks himself) and realizing no one cared when he ‘died’, that confidence went out for a pack of cigarettes and never came home.

He’s talked to Kendra about this extensively. She’s kind of become his best friend. She’s told him many times, in a variety of different ways to talk to Leonard. He came close to doing it one time when he caught Snart alone in the cargo bay, but Sara had come bouncing down the stairs and the two began to play cards. Ray had all but run back to his room.

“You know, this would be the perfect opportunity to talk to him,” Kendra says, appearing suddenly at his side. She leaned up to be heard over the music, lips brushing his ear. 

“He’s kind of busy.” Ray hands her the drink he ordered for her.

“He’s literally just sitting at a booth.”

“Yeah, talking to Mick and Professor Stein.”

“ _Ray_.” He looks at her. Her mouth is set in a strict line. “You’ve been mooning” – Ray scoffs – “over him for two months now. He’s been taunting you for three. It’s time; something, someone has to give.”

She’s right. He knows it, she knows it, the entire bar would know it if they had heard.

He downs the rest of his drink and sighs, giving her a look that is basically begging for good luck. Or maybe for her to knock him out.

He’s halfway there when the plan falls apart. A short man has beat him to the punch; smiling and laughing and touching all in the name of flirting. Ray feels his face crumple against his will, as he watches Leonard slide out of the booth and pull the stranger with him towards the restroom area.

Sara appears at his elbow, taking his hand in her small, calloused ones.

“C’mon, Ray,” she mutters.

They dance through five songs, he thinks. They keep supplying him with drinks so he’s pretty drunk, which is good because a drunk Ray is a forget-about-Snart Ray. Except he’s also a gotta-pee-really-bad Ray. He wrestles away from the group and off the dance floor, stumbling towards the restroom.

It’s a lot brighter in the tiny bathroom. His eyes take a few more seconds to adjust than they normally would, thanks to the alcohol. The smell of various bodily fluids hits him and it takes everything he’s got to not throw up on the spot.

He goes to stumble towards the closest stall, but he looks up and freezes.

Leonard is leaning against the wall of the handicapped stall, pants around his ankles and the stranger from earlier kneeling in front of him. The guy’s head is covering anything inappropriate of Snart’s and Ray is drunk enough to not feel ashamed at the disappointment he’s feeling.

He sobers up significantly when Leonard raises his eyes to meet his own. A slow smirk makes its way across his face.

There are obscene, wet sounds echoing in the room, in Ray’s head. Leonard’s head falls back against the wall, jaw dropping open slightly, but his eyes stay on Ray.

 _I should leave_ , Ray thinks. His feet don’t get the message. 

The man’s hands are making their way up Leonard’s thighs, circling around to his ass, and Ray can see when Len bucks his hips. A sharp intake of air, but neither are sure whom it comes from.

The crowd outside starts chanting the countdown to the New Year.

_10\. 9._

Leonard’s hands weave through the tuft of hair on top of his partner’s head.

_8\. 7._

Ray falls back against the door, eyes feeling heavy but refusing to close. He doesn’t want to miss this one.

_6\. 5._

Leonard’s hips roll forward again. Ray is pretty sure the poor guy is being choked, but he doesn’t seem to mind it.

_4\. 3._

They can hear Kendra over everybody, slurring her words and laughing. It should be enough to pull them out of whatever trance they’ve found themselves in. It’s not.

_2\. 1._

“Happy New Year!” is yelled throughout the bar.

Leonard’s hips stutter to a stop and a broken noise claws its way out of his throat, “ _Raymond._ ”

Ray’s hand finds the doorknob and twists it. He falls out of the restroom and runs.

\--

**+1**

They’ve been avoiding each other for four days. Or, well. Ray has been avoiding Leonard. Every time he closes his eyes, he sees Leonard coming and hears him moaning his name.

It’s been hell on his sleep.

The bad thing is, though, that they’re on a time ship. It’s larger than some airplanes, but it’s still a cramped space. Especially when Rip calls for a team meeting.

Ray arrives last. There’s a spot open next to Leonard, who’s leaning against Gideon’s center console, but Ray squeezes between Stein and Kendra. He stares intently at Rip, though he doesn’t miss the half-disappointed, half-amused look Kendra throws his way.

“We’ll need to do this very carefully,” Rip says. “By this year, Savage obviously already knows we’re coming for him. He knows every one of our faces. The information we gathered in Paris yesterday suggests he won’t be at this particular gathering, but it could be wrong.”

“So this isn’t the mission to kill him?” Kendra asks. They still have the dagger they’d stolen.

“No, no. At this point in history, he’s far too strong for us to take on. We will need the absolute advantage of surprise to defeat him.” Kendra kind of scowls at that; she doesn’t like it when people doubt her ability. “No, this is simply more information gathering. We need to know when he was at his weakest.”

“Who’s going in?” Sara leans forward on the console, clearly expecting to be chosen. Rip hesitates, like he’s afraid of the reaction he’s going to get.

“Actually, it’s sort of a two-part assignment,” he explains. “Sara and Mick will be taking certain people out of commission. They’re a literal assassin couple.”

“Assassins? Shouldn’t Sara be posing as one of them considering her, ah, experience?” Ray asks.

“They’re both men,” Rip says. He lays out a file for everyone to see and dread fills Ray’s veins. There are pictures of the pair and they look eerily similar to Leonard and himself. “We need you, Dr. Palmer, and you, Snart, to take their place. Don’t worry, though. I was told that this was simply a party for Savage’s minions.”

“So was the one they tried to desiccate Carter’s body at,” Kendra says. Something like a mixture of shame and guilt paints its way across Rip’s face, but he doesn’t deny it. Couldn’t even if he wanted to.

All of this, though, leads to Leonard and Ray entering a ballroom, together but alone. It’s supposed to be an easy enough task, except they don’t actually know what they’re looking for. The informant from Paris had only told them that they’d find a weakness of Savage’s here.

It’s also slow-going due to the fact that they’re not allowed to leave each other’s side. It was the last order Rip had given them before leaving and, considering they were in a room full of criminals, assassins, and terrorists, even Snart was taking the words to heart. The only time in the near future they’ll have a reprieve from each other is when they get back to the hotel room that was set up for the assassins they’re impersonating.

They think they should probably be keeping an eye out for a weapon. It’s the only thing they can think of that would weaken the immortal.

“He doesn’t really seem like the type to have a soft spot for kittens, does he?” Ray had whispered to Snart. It earned him a glare.

It takes three hours to figure it out. It’s not a weapon. It’s also not a basket of kittens.

They’re both tired from the socializing and trying to remember little details about their personas. Snart grabs two glasses of champagne from the waitress and hands one to Ray, grunting in frustration.

“You sound like Mick,” Ray tells him. He tries to mimic the grunt, but he can’t get his voice to go that deep and it ends up scratching his throat, choking him.

“This is _pointless_ ,” he says. He’s ignoring Ray’s coughing fit. Ray almost points out that it’s not very boyfriendly of him, but decides against it in favor of continuing to live. “There’s no weapon here and I have doubts that Savage would be attached to any of his _minions_ enough for it to constitute as a weakness.”

Just as he finishes speaking, a group of ladies walk past them. They’re gossiping loud enough that they can everything. That’s when they get the answer they were looking for.

“She’s his daughter! I could barely believe it when Cliff told me,” a redhead was saying.

“It’s not like it’s impossible to imagine. He is fairly attractive,” her friend tells her. They descend into giggles. Ray catches Leonard’s eye.

“Still, though. Her name is a little silly. Who names their child _Scandal Savage_?”

“Oh my God,” Ray breathes.

“Come on,” Snart says, tugging Ray out of the room. He doesn’t say anything until they’re in the elevator. He violently jabs at the floor level they need.

“Rip, we know what the weakness is,” Snart says. 

“Yeah, but we can’t use it,” Ray interrupts quickly.

“Why not? What’s happening?” Rip asks.

“He has a kid!” Ray exclaims. 

The elevator _dings_ and the doors slide open. A little, old couple clamor their way onto the elevator. Ray tries to smile at them. It probably looks more like a grimace. He’s sure that the rest of the team will agree with him, even if Snart and Rip don’t. They can’t use a child in their scheme.

When they finally get to their floor, Snart tells him, “Don’t worry, pretty boy. I’m not a kidnapper.”

Ray lets his shoulders fall in relief and waits as his partner unlocks the door to their room.

He strolls inside behind Snart, but barely gets the door closed behind him before Leonard has him pinned up against it, knee sliding between his legs and lips attaching to the skin below his ear. Ray inhales deeply, sharply, and tries pushing Snart away. This just results in Snart putting more of weight against Ray, reaching up to reactivate the comm link to Rip.

“There’s a surveillance camera on the table by the window,” he whispers, mouth barely moving. It’s enough to make Ray stop struggling, hands hesitating a moment before coming up to rest on the thief’s waist, fisting into the fabric of his jacket. He lets his gaze sweep the room, but he doesn’t notice anything odd. “On the lamp.”

“Are you sure?” Rip asks. They’ve been through enough that Ray can actually hear the concern in his voice. “Have you been made?”

“The CCPD has tried to catch Mick and I enough times with that trick that I can spot it a mile off,” Snart says. “But no, I don’t think we’ve been made yet. Probably just routine. Savage doesn’t seem like the type to trust anyone, even those in his own organization.”

“What do we do?” Ray breathes out. Leonard shudders against him. He mouths at the line of Ray’s jaw until just before he reaches his lips.

He pulls back far enough to smirk at Ray. “I’m going to _fuck_ you.”

And then Len’s mouth is on his, swallowing the soft gasp Ray had let escape. (“ _Jesus Christ_!” Rip shouts in their ears and then a click and – silence.) Ray’s been waiting for this for so long that he just melts into it, releasing Leonard’s jacket in favor of cupping his face. The stubble on Len’s face burns the palm of his hand and sends electricity through his veins.  
He pushes into the kiss enough that he kind of starts walking Leonard backwards, in the direction of the bed. It’s unintentional and probably a bad idea (they’re just doing this so they don’t blow their cover and Ray _knows_ this, knows he shouldn’t respond this way because _Leonard_ doesn’t know).

Len’s knees hit the bed and down, down they go.

The thief’s fingers inch their way into Ray’s jacket, gripping his shoulders momentarily before shoving the offending article down his arms. It gets tossed somewhere in the direction of the table and Leonard pauses for a moment to see if it hit the target.

It didn’t.

Next he goes for Ray’s shirt, sliding the buttons out of their holes with masterful fingers. Even though he’s being undressed and should, in theory, be cooling off because of it, Ray feels like any piece of skin Len’s fingers accidentally brush against is being scorched.

When the shirt doesn’t hit the lamp, Leonard huffs in irritation. It brings Ray back to what they’re really supposed to be doing: deactivating the camera. He’s not sure if there’s audio, but if they can at least cover it up, Ray can get close to it to try and turn it off.

He starts unbuttoning Snart’s shirt in return. He tries to do it too quickly, though. His hands are shaking, fingers trembling, and he can feel his cheeks heating up in embarrassment. Snart is just letting him struggle, an amused eyebrow quirked upward.

It’s not until Ray tries to undo the same button for the fourth time that Snart grabs his hand, bringing it up to his mouth and pressing it against his lips. He mouths the words “calm down” over the thin skin. And then Ray is on his back, Leonard hovering above him and pulling his shirt off within seconds. He tosses the shirt at the table and it’s a hit, the shirt just barely catching on the lampshade. Only, the movement kind of rolls Leonard’s hips downward and they both moan at the friction.

They should definitely be getting up and turning the camera off. That’s what they should be doing, so that they can contact Rip to come and get them the hell out of dodge.

Instead, they’re staring at each other cautiously. Their chests are heaving almost in sync. The air surrounding them is warm and thick with tension and Ray starts to wonder if he should roll Leonard off of him to retreat into the bathroom.

Then Leonard grinds his hips down experimentally and neither of them breathes.

He climbs off of Ray, who just barely has time to think “ _great, they’re going to find my half-naked, frozen body_ ,” before working the button on Ray’s pants open and pulling them down. His boxer briefs go with them. Ray sits up when Snart starts pushing his own pants down because, well. Fair is fair.

Except he only gets to enjoy the view for half a second because Len is on top of him again, moving to catch Ray’s mouth in a long kiss as their cocks line up for beautiful, split-second friction.

“Tell me what you _want_ ,” Len mutters against his lips. Ray lifts his hips and shudders at the contact it gets him. 

“I just,” he tries. His throat is tight and he’s having trouble breathing. He swallows around the lump in his throat and starts again, “I just want you.”

Len lets his forehead rest against Ray’s. He lets out a sigh.

A hand snakes its way between their bodies, tickling Ray’s stomach as it feathers downward, and wraps around his cock. Ray’s eyes drift close on their own volition. 

It shouldn’t be as sexy as it is to him. Hand jobs are usually reserved for when everyone’s too tired for anything more. This is what years and years of steady relationships have taught him. But here’s Leonard Snart, straddling his thighs and breathing harshly against his neck, stroking his dick slowly. It’s a little too dry and Ray hears a soft whine escape his throat before he can swallow it down.

“ _Raymond_ ,” Leonard mutters. His eyes flutter open and suddenly he’s staring into green eyes. He lets go of Ray’s cock, bringing his hand up to press against his jaw. “How do you feel about face sitting?”

Ray nearly comes from just the thought.

“I feel really, really great about that,” he breathes. “I’ve done it before – with Anna and Felicity, you know?”

“Little tip, Boy Scout: _don’t_ bring up the exes when you have someone else naked on top of you.”

“Right. Sorry. I’m just saying, I’m ready and willing. I can do it.”

He’s expecting Leonard to start shuffling upwards, but he finds the room blurring as Leonard once again rolls them over. Ray ends up sitting on Len’s stomach, hands bracketing his head when he throws them out to catch himself.

“ _Oh,_ ” he gasps because, well, _oh_. He’s never done the sitting. Even the few college boyfriends he did this with, Ray was always the one on his back. Distantly, but distinctly, he remembers someone telling him that his jaw just “looked like it was made for someone to sit on.” He didn’t mind it, though. He enjoyed pleasing his partners and that was just another way to do it. Nervousness makes a home inside him, though, as he looks down at Leonard.

It’s kind of awkward, getting into position, because it always is. There’s no real graceful or sexy way to do it. His hands are resting on Leonard’s chest again. He’s worrying his lower lip between his teeth in anticipation as he feels Len’s hands groping.

The second he feels Len’s mouth on his hole, he’s _gone_. They’ve been careful to stay quiet since they entered the room because they’re still not sure if the camera has an audio feed. Ray no longer cares. Len’s tongue isn’t even _inside_ of him yet, but Ray would fight anyone on whether or not this was the best thing ever.

Suddenly a finger is there, applying pressure to his opening. Ray has a split second of fear that Leonard is going to try and finger him without any kind of lube, but it’s his tongue that pushes past the rim.

His mouth drops open on a loud moan. He’s not aware of anything except the feeling of Leonard. One of his hands is on Ray’s hips, gently encouraging him to rock backwards. The other is still at his ass, holding his cheeks apart the best it can while Len moves his tongue in quick, abrupt movements.

Ray’s brain kind of shorts out when he realizes he’s doing the alphabet. He’s on the letter “M.”

It takes an embarrassingly short amount of time for Ray to reach his orgasm. When he realized what Leonard wanted, he honestly questioned if he would be able to come from just _this_ , but now his answer has spilled its way down Len’s chest.

When Ray’s breath comes back to him and he’s no longer seeing stars, he moves off of him. His nose is red and it’s weirdly adorable (not that Ray would ever tell him that; the cold gun is still in the room somewhere, after all) and erotic at the same time. A slow, lazy grin makes its way across Len’s face. Ray would kiss him if he wasn’t concerned about the ass-to-mouth aspect of it.

He settles for sucking his cock instead.

“ _Ray_ ,” Leonard sighs, hand threading through Ray’s hair. The other is gripping the duvet beside them. It’s the first time Ray has ever heard Leonard call him by his preferred name and he’d call him out on it if he weren’t so busy.

He pulls off with sound that is less an obscene pop and more of a dirty _slurp_ , Len’s hips lifting up to try and chase his mouth. Ray licks at the head of his cock softly before enveloping it in his mouth. Not going all the down, just holding it. He moans around it, knowing the vibrations will send tremors through Leonard’s body. His own cock makes a valiant twitch as he watches it, sees Leonard grip the bed even tighter. His hand in Ray’s hair stays fairly lax, though.

Licking the long vein on the underside of Len’s cock, Ray has his own fingers finding Leonard’s opening. He rubs circles around the hole just as he takes him back in his mouth, swallowing him down to the base. He hums, a little smug, as Leonard’s back arches up off the bed and feels as he comes.

He chokes down what he can (which is, admittedly, a small amount – he’s never been good at it) and spits out the rest. They’re not paying for the hotel anyways. He goes to lie beside Leonard, but he doesn’t get the chance. Leonard is up and moves to the table, knocking the lamp onto the floor.

“Good call,” Ray tells him.

\---

**Bonus.**

After the team dukes it out on whether or not to use Scandal Savage against Vandal (aka, after Kendra and Sara punch Rip again for even thinking it’d be in the cards), Ray returns to his bunkroom alone. He showers, alone, and dresses for bed.

Snart hasn’t even looked his way since they boarded the Waverider.

And look, Ray gets it. Snart is the biggest flirt on the ship. Ray can’t count how many times members of the team have walked in on him in compromising positions. Ray was a means to an end. The end being mutual orgasms.

Except he’s still pretty sure Leonard knows how he feels. He has to, after everything he’s put the tech genius through. _After the New Year’s Eve incident_. So maybe he was expecting him to at least talk to him afterwards.

Instead, Ray is lying in bed and staring up at the bottom of what used to be Carter’s bunk. By himself. He can’t even find solace in sleep because it refuses to come to him. Tossing and turning for what has to be hours, it’s probably 3 AM before he finally feels himself drifting off.

Which is, of course, when Gideon tells him that Mr. Snart is asking to be let in.

“That’s fine, Gideon, thanks,” he says. He swings his legs over the side of the bed and sits up, raising his eyebrows at his intruder when the door slides open. “What do you want, Snart?”

“I _want_ some peace and quiet from Mick’s damned snoring,” he grouches in reply. He has a pillow tucked under his arm. “He’s louder than he usually is.”

Something sinks in Ray’s chest. He ignores it. He lies back down, tossing his arm over his face to block out the light. He gestures at the bunk above his with his other hand.

“Top bunk is free.”

He hears the shuffling sounds that lets him know Leonard is coming closer. He waits for the sound of the groaning and shifting the bed used to make when Carter would climb up, but instead he feels himself being shoved over. His arm flops off of his face and he’s left to stare up at Leonard who is, in turn, staring down at him with an expectant expression.

“You’re kidding,” he says.

“Don’t make this into a _thing_ , Raymond. Just move over and let me get some shuteye.”

Ray shouldn’t do it. He knows he shouldn’t. He can hear a voice in the back of his head that sounds suspiciously like Cisco Ramon telling him to punch him in the dick and make him get out. 

He scoots over anyways.

The bed is technically too small for two grown men to share and it becomes blatantly apparent when Leonard lays down beside him. After that, it’s a bunch of moving, shifting, and rustling to get comfortable that results in Leonard Snart being the little spoon to Ray’s big spoon.

Ray is almost asleep again, forehead pressing against the back of Len’s shaved head, when Leonard speaks, “I’m not _good_ at this.”

“Sleeping? I can tell,” Ray mutters. He scooches a little closer, feet tangling with Leonard’s. Leonard huffs in irritation.

“ _Feelings_. I’m not good at feelings.”

“The guy who calls himself Captain Cold isn’t much for heart-to-hearts.” Ray laughs softly, exhaling warm air against Leonard’s neck. He feels him shudder. “Who would have thought?”

“Raymond…” Leonard says. He says it in the voice that lets Ray know he’s moving from irritation to anger. Usually, it’s a tone saved for Rip. It hasn’t been directed at Ray for a long time and he doesn’t like that it’s being used when he let him in his bed.

“I’m not asking for a marriage proposal, Snart,” Ray interrupts. “I’m not even sure I’m looking for a _relationship_. Just don’t ignore me if we have sex. Deal?”

It’s probably a little hypocritical, considering Ray avoided Leonard like the plague after 1998, but that was also a completely different situation. Leonard’s mouth hadn’t literally been on Ray’s ass that night.

It takes a moment for him to respond; Ray can almost _feel_ his inner struggle to say something snarky, but he settles for a long, drawly “Fine.”

“Good. Now shut up and go to sleep.”

**Author's Note:**

> mick was 100% fake sleeping and snoring loudly on purpose.
> 
> [tumblr](http://sarasnart.tumblr.com).


End file.
